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Thursday, 2 January 2014

Everybody’s Doing the Locomotion

its a railway signal (dhuhh)
After getting wet right down to the undies yesterday on an extended calorie-burning doggy walk up the Deerness Valley (rain, not incontinence), I needed to go and investigate the starting point of a proposed guided walk next June (that’s right, folks, we plan ahead…)
There's something about this that makes me want to buy lean rolled leg of pork from this very shop.
Would the car park of the boozer at Bolam be alright, given the landlord’s reluctance to have thirty five thirsty walkers returning to his pub? For some reason best known to himself.,the answer was “no”. So I went further around the route – to the National Railway museum at Shildon aka Locomotion. Car park A is big. Not as big as car park C, though. The chap inside the museum was friendly and helpful and couldn't imagine any reason why we couldn’t use Car Park A. We do so like people who say “yes”.
Next was the Shildon bypass. How safe is it to cross? The answer is “very safe” – there’s an underpass – decorated, though by the Shildon Bad Boyz with lots of graffiti, including a few compulsory willies. They can’t spell “fuk”.  They’ll still be in bed as we pass their underpass.
teesdale railway path
And so, job done, me and the dawg went to Mickleton for a stroll on the railway path. And, as we turned around at Romaldkirk for the return trip – it chucked it down again.
Bugger.
one of a pear (d'you see what I did there?)

On the upside, I found a pear tree once containing lots of small pears, which were now spread about on the ground. I tried one and it was delicious.
keel the stick (grrrr, nom grrr nmmm)
And Bruno found an evil stick. Apparently, this stick was so naughty that it had to be chewed up into little tiny pieces.
I’ll do a proper walk soon…
The Locomotion walk will likely be in June, 13 miles, called “Friends, Romans and Railways” and be lead by me – idea was Kathy Pagella’s who got it from the Grauniad. (It goes up a Roman road for a bit – hence the Roman bit”")

8 comments:

Reifyn said...

I must say that you always create these sentences that nobody else has probably ever said. I do love the line that ends: 'including a few compulsory willies.' Now how many people have ever said that? You could write a travel book. Give the proceeds to MIND if you want. Include some pictures. If you write funny chapter titles, the editors will snap it up like an evil stick.

Dawn said...

Gosh Mike, I never realised the Romans had railways!

Alan Rayner said...

Sounds like a plan Mike. That landlord must be a manager. I doubt a tenant would turn away around £100-£150.

Mike Knipe said...

Reifyn - I may not have been entirely sober when I wrote this post, partly due to Stag's Breath ( a mix of honey and scotch - sort of meady whisky...) I've tarted up the post now. ..compulsory willies.... shocking...

Mike Knipe said...

Dawn - There's a scrap of wood in the museum in Durham with writing on it in which where Pliny the Younger writes to the commander of Vinovium (Bishop Auckland) complaining about the cost of his season ticket.

Mike Knipe said...

Alan - I don't believe he's thought this through!

Tony Bennett said...

I hope Bert the Butcher hasn't been forced to retire because of the Hepatitis E in sausages scare!

Mike Knipe said...

They never have any diseases they can't spell up here in stottieland, Tony. That's why we were never bothered with Dithperia... Dethprenie... Dripnethia....